Wow, thank you for introducing us to Alan Weisman. I love his two tips. Those are evergreen. I was taught in both my careers to ask questions until I fully understand, and never worry about appearing "dumb." In fact, "dumb" in these contexts is an asset. My editor(s) in journalism made me go back and ask the subject of my story MORE questions if necessary. I didn't like it, but I knew they were right. And then when I became a therapist, my supervisor/mentor gave me a great piece of advice about how to work with counseling clients. She said, "Be Columbo." Peter Falk would always act like he was dumb and keep asking questions until he got the criminal to confess. If I keep asking questions (some of which might seem obvious), my client's story slowly emerges.
My supervisor also told me to "Be Columbo" and I used that throughout my long career as a family therapist. Just yesterday in listening to the audible book, Healing The Soul Wound Eduardo Duran said the same thing and he added that Columbo 's questions were simple questions! Love it!!!
I love asking questions. I think there's an art to asking a good question-- one that will open the subject up, or bring complexity to a conversation. I know everyone is playing the I'm smarter than you game, but I guess I'm over that. Smart people ask questions & politically It can be an effective way to encourage dialogue and critical thinking.
There is an art about questions and exhibiting curiosity. I've delighted in encouraging people of all ages to engage with their natural connections over my career.
Hopefully, I continue that now in my post-paid work life with posts that occasionally prompt reflection, too.
I've occasionally had the experience in an unprompted way (answering a question in a large audience, when I was in the audience and not the presenter) of feeling like my response was channeled from deep within. It was powerful and unusual.
I am generally the person asking the odd/awkward/unanswerable question in a group. And I've been harassed for it. When I see this happening to someone else, I will jump on the question bandwagon with them. I'll say I'm curious about it too. If I hear someone asking a question quietly to themselves, I'll offer my hand and voice to get an answer.
Thank you for sharing these tips . I learn so much from you!
I heard once that “the person who asks questions is the one in control.” The example given was of law enforcement questioning a suspect. Obviously there’s discernment necessary for our own safety in which situations to do what I’m about to say, but in general if we can keep ourselves from being put on the defensive and instead turn around and ask the questioner questions, then we maintain our authority and control. I can attest that it works in parenting a strong-willed one 😊
Also one more thing I’ve learned, is to start statements with “I’m curious” - or “ I wonder” - they aren’t as threatening to the receiver. I’ve worked a lot with language study in conflict/ uncomfortable conversations. It’s a true art and I’m always learning more
Wow, thank you for introducing us to Alan Weisman. I love his two tips. Those are evergreen. I was taught in both my careers to ask questions until I fully understand, and never worry about appearing "dumb." In fact, "dumb" in these contexts is an asset. My editor(s) in journalism made me go back and ask the subject of my story MORE questions if necessary. I didn't like it, but I knew they were right. And then when I became a therapist, my supervisor/mentor gave me a great piece of advice about how to work with counseling clients. She said, "Be Columbo." Peter Falk would always act like he was dumb and keep asking questions until he got the criminal to confess. If I keep asking questions (some of which might seem obvious), my client's story slowly emerges.
My supervisor also told me to "Be Columbo" and I used that throughout my long career as a family therapist. Just yesterday in listening to the audible book, Healing The Soul Wound Eduardo Duran said the same thing and he added that Columbo 's questions were simple questions! Love it!!!
I love asking questions. I think there's an art to asking a good question-- one that will open the subject up, or bring complexity to a conversation. I know everyone is playing the I'm smarter than you game, but I guess I'm over that. Smart people ask questions & politically It can be an effective way to encourage dialogue and critical thinking.
Thank you.Thank you. Printed this for my Trackless Wild Journaling in Place notebook.
I like Jane Goodall's advice about addressing a committee or body of government: tell a story about the issue. A story they can relate to.
There is an art about questions and exhibiting curiosity. I've delighted in encouraging people of all ages to engage with their natural connections over my career.
Hopefully, I continue that now in my post-paid work life with posts that occasionally prompt reflection, too.
I've occasionally had the experience in an unprompted way (answering a question in a large audience, when I was in the audience and not the presenter) of feeling like my response was channeled from deep within. It was powerful and unusual.
I am generally the person asking the odd/awkward/unanswerable question in a group. And I've been harassed for it. When I see this happening to someone else, I will jump on the question bandwagon with them. I'll say I'm curious about it too. If I hear someone asking a question quietly to themselves, I'll offer my hand and voice to get an answer.
Thank you for sharing these tips . I learn so much from you!
I heard once that “the person who asks questions is the one in control.” The example given was of law enforcement questioning a suspect. Obviously there’s discernment necessary for our own safety in which situations to do what I’m about to say, but in general if we can keep ourselves from being put on the defensive and instead turn around and ask the questioner questions, then we maintain our authority and control. I can attest that it works in parenting a strong-willed one 😊
Also one more thing I’ve learned, is to start statements with “I’m curious” - or “ I wonder” - they aren’t as threatening to the receiver. I’ve worked a lot with language study in conflict/ uncomfortable conversations. It’s a true art and I’m always learning more
P.S. That photo by Crumbstarz is mind-bending!
Janisse, your timing is impeccable.
Love you forever🌱